Here’s my artistic and psychological evolution over the past four years.
It’s interesting to reflect on my changing attitudes and approach to the same subject matter. Through it all I remained brave and kept my sense of humour, even when I fell into despair.
It feels good to look back on the tremendous growth my art has made in a few years. I just reached a point where I was ashamed that I was in my 30’s and my art had barely improved since high school. Now I can clearly see progress.
July 22nd, it’s been three years since I nearly died in a hit-and-run. I still live in the aftermath of that incident, but it was also a moment of rebirth for me. I’ve learned a lot, about myself, about pain, about trust, about people, and society.
I will always carry this anger, but it is a good anger. It is not the kind of flame to destroy, but the flame to forge and strengthen.
I wonder if this will be the last art piece I create to commemorate this day. I wanted to capture where I am now. I am in a much better place than I’ve possibly ever been. It was fitting that I latched onto Kazuhira during my recovery, as he too is a character who falls to similar depths and later drags himself out of Hell.
We will never be the same again, but we now have a new equilibrium.
(I’m still waiting on that damn insurance payment!)
I’m always trying to push myself to broaden my skills. I’ve become quite a fan of watercolour as of late. This is the most complicated things I’ve ever done in this medium. It was scary to paint those shadows in. But I think it worked in the end.
Here’s another shot of my MGSV Revolver Ocelot, always fascinating to see how different photographers interpret your costume. This one was shot by CK Imagery at Evolve Pop Culture Expo 2024. See this costume photographed by Snap Happy Ian here.
Here’s another solo shoot, just me and my phone camera. This is around the same spot that I did my first Naked Snake photoshoot, although they have since destroyed that beautiful little alcove of trees I had used. Still the area provided the kind of scenery I needed, with bonus authentic mosquitoes. I was being eaten alive, it was worth it. It’s nice to see how far my costume and my physique have come in about a year. That STABO harness was a nightmare from beginning to end. It’s been my white whale for years, I finally found authentic parachute clips online, but they only shipped to the United States, so I needed my dad to order them and ship them to me. I thought sewing the straps would take an hour tops, instead it took nine hours. It’s a complicated system to begin with, but then in the game, there’s no adjustment straps, so I had to tailor to fit me exactly. Then on top of that I had to figure out a bunch of hidden tricks to make it conform better to my body.
The final piece missing from this costume is the radio switchbox, and maybe an M1911 replica gun.
A big thanks to Snap Happy Ian for these most excellent photos.
This Revolver Ocelot costume was mostly assembled from pieces found at op-shops and military swap meets. I added the capelet to the jacket about a year ago, and dyed the bandolier and styled the wig the night before the expo.
I wear a lot of these items as part of my everyday wardrobe, with the intention of minimising the waste and excess that cosplay often entails.
Here’s what six months of colouring practice looks like. Below is the last time I drew Venom Snake in colour. I used Zensations mechanical coloured pencils, I know how to use them better now, but I still don’t like them much.
Watercolour pastels and ink.
This was a fun project, I didn’t make this costume from scratch, I altered one I ordered from a Chinese cosplay website. I replaced the vinyl fabric buckles with metal ones, replaced the vinyl straps with webbing, and made the knife holder out of leather. All touches to give this costume authenticity. I wore it for the first time to a convention today, it’s sweaty and there isn’t much flexibility, but overall I think this costume was decent. Not many people recognised the character, most thought I was Black Widow.
Photos by Steam Kittens
Travian Designs 